I could be doing anything productive at this point instead of typing up another diaryland entry... but when I start to read about "Ecto Cooler" (as in the Hi-C drink) on Wikipedia, I think I'm ready for just a bit of distraction.
Presently I am sitting at the computer lab at school. Soon I will be going to take a quiz for German that I skipped to attend the LTJ concert so I probably should be studying or something useful. What ever happened to that desire to get 4.0's this semester? It was promptly flushed down the poop-shoot.
I was thinking about that on my drive to school. I really am at a loss as to what I am going to do as a real career. I just know that I want to continue studying after undergraduate, but, seriously, what in hell am I going to do with all that I've learned??
I have this social awareness where I know that I want to contribute positively to the world, but what? I don't grasp my facts as solidly as other in my classes. Some of it my fault (I let myself get distracted), but a lot of it is that it takes of a repetition for me to get an idea completely and be able to work with it proficiently.
What if I fail at everything? What if I get really close to doing something really spectacular and I trip at the finish line (as I seem to have a habit of doing)?
So, yeah, if you ever wondered what I do in my 40-minute drive between school and home, I scare the bejeezus out of myself with thoughts like this.
