--you couldn't live a life with maybe's and what if's--
1:36 pm & Sept. 15, 2005

So I haven't been very good at keeping up with entries. You really can't blame, you know. My host mother has a computer with the internet, but she hasn't offered it for my use, so I am just going to assume that I can't use it.

The greatest part of my life right now is... :: drum roll :: I'm going to ITALY!!!!!!!! I will be visiting Pisa, Florence and then Rome for a week! This is after I spend a week in Berlin, so that's two weeks filled with touring, clubbing, drinking, dancing, photographing, etc. The saddest part about the Internet is that you really can't see how excited I am.

Right now, every time I think about Italy, I start to hyper ventilate or stop breathing altogether. Last night when I told my host mother where I was going, I felt this gigantic bubble of giddiness pop inside me and I couldn't speak coherently. I seriously think that I must be in love to be so happy.

I have been to Germany before and when I was packing for my stay here... I was nervous and pressured, so I couldn't truly feel excited.

But Italy....

I will see the Sistine Chapel and the Tuscany Mountains and taste the wine in the rich atmosphere of a beautiful, ancient culture! I am getting dizzy with anticipation... I feel like swooning.

Yes, I am in love. This weekend I will be partying in Bonn and then Amsterdam the next and soon Berlin and then Italy!! I am finally doing something so selfishly for myself and have desired to do for so long! I couldn't feel more free.

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